94* I’m not the only one

Listening to my 10 year old cousin sing this song broke my heart.

 

I’m not the only one by Sam Smith.

The official music video (which btw features actor Chriss Messina who plays Dr. Dany Castellano on «The Mindy Project» -one of my favorite series-) shows a love story ending because of infidelity but somehow the lyrics of this song resonate in so many more aspects of life.

Is about counting on someone and then watching them let you down. Without reason. Without logic. It seems unbelievable and certainly the pain is unrealistic. And time after, when you should feel like forgiving them for making you sufer… you only want them to forgive you. But forgive you for what? You don’t even know what you did to make them want to leave but still you want them back. Withough logic. Without reason.

Hopefully, or saddly, I know I’m not the only one that has felt this once… or maybe even twice. Not the only one who sometimes feels alone even at a sea of people, not the only one who fakes smiles while trying not to cry, not the only one who’s thinking about someone that has long forgotten me…

And if you have ever felt like this aswell; know that you’re not the only one either, my dear.

You and me, we made a vow
For better or for worse
I can’t believe you let me down
But the proof’s in the way it hurts

For months on end I’ve had my doubts
Denying every tear
I wish this would be over now
But I know that I still need you here

You say I’m crazy
‘Cause you don’t think I know what you’ve done
But when you call me baby
I know I’m not the only one

You’ve been so unavailable
Now sadly I know why
Your heart is unobtainable
Even though Lord knows you kept mine

(…)

I have loved you for many years
Maybe I am just not enough
You’ve made me realize my deepest fear
By lying and tearing us up