Down the road

Maggie: I love you.

Antoine: …

Maggie: And down the road I’ve learned that there’s no way to love you more, to love you less. I love you as I have always loved you. From the first day when we met, to this day. I love you, Antoine. You always knew that, right?

 

A: I haven’t forgotten the night you visited me at the hospital… when I had that heart attack and my son called you because he thought I was about to die.

M: I would never forget that call. I felt my whole world collapse.

A: I heard him while he was calling you, I told him not to.

M: Why?

A: I’m not sure. I wasn’t sure that I was about to die so I thought there was no point on alarming you. But also, I considered dying, and I wasn’t sure I wanted you to watch me die anyway… I knew how it felt watching someone you love slowly go… and I didn’t wanted that for you.

 

M: So when your wife died…

A: So unfair.

M: True… Judy was amazing.

A: Honestly, she was indeed. Weren’t you jealous of her all this time?

M: Jealous? Not for a second, she had cancer, remember?

A: Don’t be mean, you know what kind of jealous I’m talking about. Not that you wanted her life but maybe…

M: Not. Maybe nothing, my love.

 

M: Remember when you had your first kid?

A: As if it were yesterday.

M: You were such a dork back in the days.

A: What you mean by “a dork”?

M: You know! Adorable but kind of dump haha

A: Kind of dump! What a thing to say!

M: Don’t sweat it, boy! All men are dorks when they are new parents.

A: I guess so… I must admit it’s one of the scariest yet most amusing parts of life.

M: Being a new parent… So many feelings, fears, dreams…

A: Now you are being a dork…

M: Ha! Is there any other way to be a parent?

 

M: Ugh, the divorce. Remember my divorce? I always wonder why I married him in the first place.

A: Because you had his kid.

M: Yes, right, that’s the logical answer but that wasn’t it. I had options. I could have chosen to be a single mother or abortion!

A: You couldn’t possibly, you were too proud of yourself to give anyone a chance to judge you.

M: Can’t deny it… I tried so hard to make it look like that was all I wanted: a family, a husband, a kid…

A: Though it wasn’t.

M: You were the only one who ever knew the truth.

A: That it was a mistake? That you, Maggie-the-perfect, messed up?

M: I didn’t even admit it to my mother. I regret that so much, you know?

A: Never ever told her?

M: Never-ever told anyone but you.

A: Woah… why? You know that humans do make mistakes, right Maggie?

M: Not me, you said it, Maggie-the-perfect… I couldn’t deal with it any other way. I couldn’t believe I had messed up my whole damn life in one night.

A: So you weren’t just lying to everyone… you were also lying to yourself.

M: Saying that it had been my intention to have that kid made me feel less stupid. I knew what everyone was thinking: poor stupid girl who felt in love with his professor and got pregnant. Such a cliché! Oh no, sir, I wasn’t going to be that stupid kiddo. No way. I had to do it. I had to affirm that I had everything under control, I was so decided to turn it all around… but how little I knew, ha… Anyway, even if I now regret it, I know it was the only thing that helped me go through it at that moment.

A: Lying?

M: Stop saying that I lied. I said that that was part of the plan to get me where I wanted and it actually did, by marrying Charles, a well known writer, a Chicago Tribune columnist, a professor of the Art Institute of Chicago, I got included in the top writing circles and God knows if without that green-card as a husband I would had made it to where I did.

A: You certainly would have, Maggie. Don’t fool yourself now, it’s been so long and there’s no wrong in admitting a past mistake.

 

M: And college; those million classes we had together… Ugh so painful.

A: Shut up, you still loved me then.

M: Of course I did, that’s why it was so painful

A: Well, I hated you, that’s why it was painful for me.

M: Why did you hate me?

A: You know well the answer. Or shall I say, the answer’s name…

 

A: Remember that Halloween we wore matching costumes and we strolled through the city the whole day long wearing them …

M: Don’t…

A: …Our trip to the cemetery, the “trick and treat” part, all the candy we stole from those kids and…

M: Don’t bring back that memory, Antoine, please!

A: …the party we crashed when the night came, what we did before it got us to jail for the first time! And I recall you were so afraid, and for the first time also I was the brave one, I stood up to the cop just as I did to your parents later that night.

M: …

A: Well, I guess you remember… Say something. You can’t deny it was so good.

M: Doesn’t it bother you to remember it was?

A: Bothers me? Why would it? Every time I think about it, I smile.

M: But it’s not a happiness smile, it’s a nostalgic smile, my dear.

A: What’s the difference? I smile because it was good.

M: Well, that’s why it bothers me so much. It was so good but so ephemeral. For so long it represented everything I would miss in the time to come… That was the day I felt alive for the first time, the day I knew what love was, what freedom felt like, while being behind that mask, not being me but a different self, I realized how it felt not to care about what others think, and what it meant having someone to trust, being sure that someone would have your back no matter what, not being afraid. I’ve never felt that way again, and that’s why I can’t bear to remember that day. It was one in a million; I’ve never had a day like that before, and I’ve never had a day like that after.

 

A: Have you realized that they day we broke up… was the day it all started?

M: …

A: When you called me at 3 am after that big, stupid fight… and you told me you loved me and that you just wanted to make it clear that it was because of all that love that you were choosing to let me go.

M: Wasn’t the Halloween adventure before our break up?

A: No. But you know that. I loved you more when we broke up.

M: You loved me more when you didn’t have me, what a shame, all men are the same.

A: Halloween was two months after our break up, we had started talking again a few weeks before…

M: I know… And I also remember I told you I wanted to do something for Halloween…

A: And I knew how much you loved Halloween

M: So instead of just suggesting a normal thing to do, scary-movies marathon, trick or treat night…

A: I planned the whole thing. Well, except for the cops part.

M: Oh! So you planned the party crashing and the pot and…

A: Before you accuse me of planning our first time too, I must assure you that was just a silver linning!

M: I don’t believe you.

A: I don’t need you to believe me, I’ve never had.

M: So back to the point, seems like I was right again.

A: What are you talking about?

M: About letting you go. You just said that was the day when it all started.

A: Oh no, if you hadn’t let me go everything would have happened anyway but more nicely.

M: You know it wouldn’t. We wouldn’t have passed from the high-school-sweethearts label.

A: So what you are saying is you were damn sure that by breaking my heart we could go past that label to what was about to unfold between us, a lifetime relationship.

M: Damn sure I was, you are right.

A: You’re wicked. And you are heartless… yet you called me that night saying you loved me.

M: I called you at 3 am that night because I knew you hated me at that moment but I wanted to make sure that you’ll love me down the road.

A: …

M: And now… that we’ve been down the road, darling… would you say you love me?

A: …

M: Do you, Antoine?

A: I hate… I hate to do this. But I guess I must admit you were right all this time… Yes, you were always right, Maggie. And I love you.

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My FIRST TIME

My first time watching this sweet movie called “THE FIRST TIME” ❤

American teenage romantic comedy from 2012. Watch online here!

 

(Some spoilers ahead!)

 

I really liked the beginning of this movie, how they introduce you to the teenage-world in one continuous shot along a party where you see the common factors of it as: alcohol, couples making-out, fights and laughs, everything blurry but sharp at the same time.

 

Then there’s the main story beginning when the super cute and hot Dave Hodgman (Dylan O’brien) is nervous outside the party practicing a speech he prepared for the girl he likes when suddenly a random girl appears in scene, this is Aubrey Miller (Britt Robertson) who is open enough to start a conversation with the boy and to even express her most honest opinion to this guy she just met -Later on the movie we’ll get clarified that that’s just the way she is, honest and forthright-

The rest of the meeting-scene could seem cheesy but is easier to believe if you analyze that they were at the end of a night in which both of them were looking for fun but suddenly ended up alone with nobody watching, factors that in real life could lead to those kind of moments.

 

In fact what I liked the most about this movie (aside from watching Dylan shirtless) is that I’d actually give it an 8 out of 10 in the rate of how “realistic” it is, something too high for a teenage romantic comedy but remarkable for making their best effort at showing an intense topic between teenagers without turning it into a too cheesy perfect illustration of how Hollywood think it is.

The only big details I found cheesy were:

  • Everything happens in just three days, since the main characters meet until the end of the weekend when they are the best couple ever.
  • The main character, Dave (Dylan) is perfect. He is a good boy who’s main interest is not sex and who actually wants to fall in love truly… fine, I do believe hope that there are still boys like him out there but what I hope the most is that there are boys as respectful, smart and HOT as him out there too!
  • lol

But what I do love is that it expressed very well the thoughts, situations and emotions of this hormonal phase that includes social worries and romantic illusions along abrupt changes of opinion and interests. Being the most remarkable change how Aubrey and Dave fell in love of one another even though they were supposedly in love with other persons at the moment they met. It actually happens, is easy to change our minds at this age of highs and lows, hormones and wh+res.

 

Something else that surprised me was the representation of two stereotypes:

-> On one hand we find Aubrey trying too hard to fit in “the mature girl” stereotype, acting as the smartest one who’s not getting drunk or high, the one that respects her body and who’s dating an older guy but at the end we find out (at the same time she does too) that she is just an average teenager with the same urgency and concerns as any other and that it doesn’t make her worse nor better.

-> On the other hand is Jane Harmon (Victoria Justice) who’s an accurate representation of “the popular girl” that knows she’s pretty and take advantage of this.

She complains about boys being self-absorbed as she doesn’t realize that she is too. What’s more she totally friendzoned Dave who is a complete gentleman to her but she keeps complaining about boys and how none of them are gentlemen!

 

 

 

Some perfectly represented situations:

The way Dave always consulted his friends after any situation is so real!

 

 

It would be silly to think that a boy ain’t going to go to his friends and tell them everything he just did…

If girls do the same!

 

And also the way Aubrey’s boyfriend told Dave that he was going to have sex with Aubrey is something realistic because most some boys like to brag about it and again it would be too idealistic to expect them to keep the secret of something that is usually consider an achievement between them and not exactly a sentimental issue.

So boys and girls telling their friends about their life (before or after they do anything) is a fact we must deal with in real life too. Because when we are teenagers our friends become our conscience, and as Dave did, we enjoy considering different points of view before doing our next move. Or as Aubrey’s boyfriend did, we are at an age where the more attention we are looking for, the more we presume and also not every teenager keeps every aspect of their life as secrets.

And if you haven’t seen this movie yet I’m going to spare a major spoiler here and the only thing I’m saying about the most important scene of this movie -the first time scene- is that I can’t be more thankful for how realistic they ended it.

Along the movie they included some kind of moral details as the car crash of some drunk teenagers showing the fragility of life and how being drunk can seem too cool at a party but is too dangerous at reality.

Or Dave’s line when he says that sex is better before you do it because after that it is just sex… good pitch to abstinence!

 

In general I think it’s great how it represents teenage reality. A lot of confusion and excitement, funny moments, great memories but most of all a lot of learning. Usually I watch movies in which every movement or situation that the characters live I’m like “that’s so not possible in real life” but here every step seemed comprehensible, actually as if a friend was telling me about his/her life.

Yeah, I dig it.

P.S. Listen to this song that remind me of the movie, let’s see if you can relate it too!